Hey Fattie! Stop Warming The Globe

by David Lauterbach
2009 April 22
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According to a recent report in The Sun, scientists are blaming fat people–at least partially–as contributors to global warming.

Scientists warned that the increase in big-eaters means more food production–a major cause of CO2 gas emissions warming Mother Earth.  And of all the days to find this out, it had to be on Earth Day 🙁

Dr. Phil Edwards (one of those scientists) says overweight people are more likely to drive (adding to environmental damage) and each fat person is said to be responsible for emitting a ton more of climate-warming carbon dioxide per year than a thin one.

The scientists say providing extra grub for fatties to guzzle adds to carbon emissions that heat up the world, melting polar ice caps, raising sea levels and killing rain forests.

But don’t worry, even if the scientists think you’re fat, Mother Earth loves you and knows you’re just big boned.  Happy Earth Day.

Pardon us please, while we pay for beer...

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